1. I'm the queen of all. 2. All that vajiggle jaggle is not beautimus. (mama)
3. There's been a lot of flesh-eating bacteria disease. (mama)
4. I likes to get in the mud because I like to get dirty like a pig.
5. Today Pumpkin's gunna be bobbing for pig feet. I thought the pig feet were kind of disgusting. I thought they would be some cookedness to it, but they was actually raw. (mama)
7. She enjoys pageantry, mud bogging, and being with her family. (pageant announcer introduces Honey Boo Boo)
8. My mother has told me in the past that if you fart 12-15 times a day you can lose a little weight, so I think I'll lose a lot of weight because I'm going to fart a lot. (Chubbs prepares for her diet)
9. My mama weighs the most in my family because she's fat. Truth.
11. We're kinda like a lopsided, obtuse triangle all put together. Like a deformed shape. (mama explains her family)
12. I'll stop passing gas when I'm dead. (Pumpkin defends herself)
13. No one can be proper and etiquettely all the time. (mama)
14. It's called a biscuit because it looks like a biscuit and it opens up. (mama explains vaginas)
16. I wish I was in there. I wish it was me in there. (Honey Boo Boo bonds with an inflatable snow globe)
17. What does it look like I'm doing? Getting my finger stuck in my p-? (mama talks back to Sugar Bear)
18. I kind of want to go spend time by myself. (Honey Boo Boo mourns Glitzy Pig)
19. I gotta take a s-. (Pumpkin goes mud-bogging)
21. You better redneckognize! (Honey Boo Boo sasses the camera)
22. You got to wear this to bed tonight. That is smexy. (mama checks out Sugar Bear in his Santa suit)
23. All the Santa Clauses are really like my friends. This is my daddy, this is my mama, and this is my big brother.
25. When June sat on my lap, she didn’t ask for nothing, but I couldn’t feel my feet. (Sugar talks about his near-death experience)
26. I'm talking in Spanish. Oh my door nuts!
27. The thing I love about Glitzy is that she loves me.
29. I smell like a bowl of oyster stew so I gotta get clean. (Sugar Bear takes a shower)
30. Ow, it's going through my va-jay-jay. (Chickadee describes her contractions)
31. It's gonna smell like poop when she poops. (Honey Boo Boo worries about the baby)
33. When my belly hurts, it's usually gas. Or too many chicken nuggets.
34. Mama, this life jacket makes me look like a chunky lemon! (Honey Boo Boo gets her safety on)
35. I don't straddle things very well. (mama reveals her one regret)
37. C'mon, Mama. Show your forklift foot!
38. Spray tan's like poop in a can. (Honey Boo Boo writes an impromptu limerick)
39. Here comes the kwaaaaaaahhhhhhnnnnn!
40. IM SWEATIN LIKE A WHORE IN CHIRCH.
42. Couponing, it's even better than sex.
43. I have three sisters. Pumpkin is the craziest. Anna is the pregnantest. And Jessica is my favorite, like my BFF.
44. A dollar makes me holler, honey boo boo!
45. Those others girls must be crazy if they think they’re gonna beat me, honey boo boo child!
47. You can’t tell that pig what to do.
48. My momma thinks she’s all that and a pack of crackers, but she’s not.
49. I’ll stop passing gas when I’m dead. (Pumpkin)
50. Golly! Y’all smell like hairspray and desperation over there. (mama)
52. What? Cheeseballs?
54. Please, women that are of voluptuous size, put some clothes on... All that vajiggle jaggle is not beauteous. (mama)
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